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We Don't Want Our Daughter Circumcised
- Details
- Published on Saturday, 07 July 2007 08:13
But what would you expect of a nine-year-old? Yet, she is supposed to have matured into adulthood through circumcision. Her mother Beatrice Kwamboka, left her Nyamira home early last year after the threat to circumcise her daughter became apparent."My mother-in-law (as is tradition) sent for my daughter along with her other grandchildren. But I knew what that meant, so I decided to take her away from home," the mother says.
Kwamboka also refused to participate in the celebrations that followed for the other nieces that went through the operation. She came to Nairobi with her daughter where her father lives and works and since then Roberta has been going to a city school and won't go back to Nyamira because the threat to circumcise her stands.
"I went through it, in 1978 and it was a traumatic experience for me. I also had a difficult labour among other problems and I can't let it happen to my daughter," the 29-year-old Kwamboka says.
She says that she has reflected on the issue and has realised it is a harmful practice that threatens the life of girls."Some die due to bleeding, and we also know that the way it is done (using one razor blade for many girls) can infect them with HIV."
She says even though her community holds the practice dear, she knows it is irrelevant for her child."I can't see what this young girl will learn about marriage or men through the traditional rite," she says. "She is just a child."In 1978, when she went through it, Kwamboka remembers being secluded for a month and her mother's friends and relatives stopping by to eat and drink.
"There was a tutor, too, who would talk to me about how to be grown up, responsible, how to respect men and womanhood."During that time, she was not supposed to come out of the house or be seen by anyone. After that, she was not allowed to sleep under the same roof with her father.
"But I was only in class two, how grown up can an eight-year-old be?" she asks. She remembers it as a traumatic time, which she suffered for despite other people's enjoyment."But as a first-born, I had to do it for my parents because it determined their standing in society."
She says some of the educational significance has ceased, since there are hardly any of the traditional tutors left and also because the ritual is being done in an almost clandestinely manner. The local administration has apparently been discouraging the community from it.
The practice in Nyamira and the rest of Kisii is celebrated during the school holidays and groups of girls (of Roberta's age) are secluded after the ritual.
But Kwamboka wants to go beyond her personal realm. She wants to raise awareness about the harmfulness of the practice by walking from Nairobi to Nyamira - about 350 kilometres - between April 20 and 30. This will include stops in Nakuru, Kericho and other centres.
"I know many young girls like her are going to go through this unfair practice and we really need to stop it," she adds.
Through the walk she wants to talk to organised groups along the route and to use the opportunity to talk to elders, chiefs, decision makers, the clergy, the administration and the community in general. She also hopes to raise funds (through the walk) for follow-up activity aimed at eliminating FGM.
"The leaders are the ones who can stop it and who can convince the community that it is no longer necessary."Her walk will culminate with a workshop with leaders in Nyamira. But why is the practice so important? Why won't it stop despite efforts to eliminate it?
Pastor Ageta, Kwamboka's husband, says the practice was important because it was intended to curtail women's sexual urge hence control their possibility to have multi-partners."But it is also a great time for the community and involves lots of celebration, which people love."He says the ceremonies are so important that even when the initiates die due to bleeding, the community does not see it as a medical situation."Death due to bleeding is believed to occur to girls who have had a sexual experience before the initiation."
They also associate any fatal incident with women who would have had a sexual experience the previous night and "crossing the initiates blood."We want to demystify all this, so people can start seeing these issues soberly and medically."
He says he supports efforts to stop the practice and would like to have a "middle ground" to negotiate for its elimination.
He proposes that girls' circumcision - termed as gochia maguta motwe or anointing/smearing of oil should be left as a symbolic experience.
"We need to replace the cut with a symbolic anointing in which women of high standing can anoint the girls during the ceremony," he suggests."Women like Claire Omanga, the Kisii mayor, could preside over such functions and symbolically anoint the girls but without a cut."
Kwamboka notes that all the communities along her walk path practice girls' circumcision hence the need to create awareness.She says through discussions and project work, mothers can begin to see why the practice is not good for their daughters.
